Thursday, August 13, 2015

Kitten on a Rooftop: The Thrust Diaries Case 1 Review

Alright, so I wanted something to read. Something sexy. Something cool. Something... with superheroes! Who doesn't love superheroes? They've been on my mind a lot since I finished
Villainess, and you know, it's sort of a small subsect of the erotica genre which is growing in popularity, so why not review one?

I chose Kitten on a Rooftop: The Thrust Diaries Case 1 because I thought if I liked it, there's more out there, yeah? It's written by Sasha Twyst. I liked the cover too, because it's all comic-booky, and I really like comic books. (I'm a Marvel girl though, sorry DC chaps... although the husband is expanding my interest in the DC 'verse) It doesn't scream erotica, but that's ok. Not all erotica covers do, and the title certainly says it's all about fucking, so that's cool. When I found out the super heroine's name wasn't like "The Azure Kitten" I was disappointed though... because I felt Kitten being used here was derogatory, because the heroine's name was actually Puma Blue... which isn't a bad name. (Side note: Herr Jackalope for a villain name was fantastic! Sadly, we do not get to see Herr Jackalope in action. I was sad.)

Initially, the tale starts off with a hero talking about how people got super powers almost overnight due to the "Wonder Event" (sound familiar? Heh) and how the dude was surprised to magically have rock hard abs and be in perfect shape, and super strength and invulnerability, etc etc etc. Ok, so obligatory background out of the way, the plot is... two heroes meet on a rooftop and fuck.

I have two main problems with this book, and that last sentence is my first problem. This is like "Two people meet in a bar and fuck". Where's the dastardly villain who seduces the heroine? (or the hero!) Where's the foiling of the evil plot? Where's the minions they get to bash in the head and then embrace dramatically afterwards (and have lots of sex)? Meet on a rooftop. Fuck.


Let's say it all together guys: that isn't a plot. It's a situation, a single cog in a machine that goes nowhere in this book. A single cog, after all, does not make a machine. A single situation does not make a story. Even in erotica, there's got to be some tension, some action (even if it's romantic tension--that's action in erotica!). Taking another story for example, Donut Slut, there's a story there. It's not a huge story, but there's a story. Chick gets donuts, is warned against them, fucks donuts, humiliating (and satisfactory) ending/resolution... AND there was a denouement in that one. That's four separate parts in that pretty quick erotica. This story... there's the introduction which set up the world... and they fuck on a roof. I really feel there was a missed opportunity here. A huge missed opportunity. The villain had minions called "Bunnymen" for crying out loud! We have bits and pieces of a backstory here, and it's just... meet on a roof and fuck. Can you tell I'm stuck on that?

The second major problem with this is... I'm about 99.9% ad infinitum sure this was written by a dude. Ok, ok, Alana, you might ask me, how do you know that? First, it's in the male first person POV... which doesn't mean shit honestly. It's a little weird for m/f stories to have a male POV, but not unheard of. I often write in the male perspective (usually third person though) during m/f stories myself. I have a theory that it's because I happen to like mostly "dude" stuff: comics, spy movies, actions movies, horror, video games, etc etc. (even though those things aren't "dude" things, just things, most people associate dudes with them still). As I was reading though, when we get to the female MC, she's described in luscious detail with her breasts... and I started to check out mentally here. I don't care. Women don't care (generally) about a woman's ta-tas and how huge they are. Ok, ok, but it IS from a dude's POV so that would be in line with the character.

And then we get to the pussy licking. Ok, ok, yes, girls all like it different... but not really. There are some lucky, lucky women who do come from penis in vagina sex. However, most women do really need to have clitoral stimulation. When the guy licking her sex goes around her vagina--NOT clitoris, vagina... oh hell, let me quote:
I said nothing, my mouth otherwise occupied, but swirled my tongue around in circles just at the entrance to her pussy then as deep as I could go [with his tongue].
Third strike, you're out, yo. I can quite well imagine what that would feel like, and I would be confused rather than orgasming. Granted, all women are different, all people have different kinks and turn-ons, and all people come in different way. I get that. For me, it was really distracting. I kept on thinking Puma Blue was faking it. That is not the impression you want to get from erotica.

The idea I thought was great (hey, I'm writing super powered erotica too, so of course I think it's an awesome idea!), and I think the writer can write. The prose was pretty clean and well edited. There's hints at a background there, and other things going on... we just don't get to see it. It was frustrating. That, and the all male mindset really threw me out of the story. However, I'm not taking off too many points for that because it's not the male POV that threw me, but the style/writing choices while writing in that perspective. I'd give it four rooftop fucks out of ten.

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